He only gives you what you can handle......

Have you heard that statement before? That he never gives you more then you can handle. I have heard it a few times in my life and to tell you the truth I'm done with it!! I think I have handled enough over the years and I don't want to do it any more! I mean come on already! What have I done to deserve all of this! It seems like it's a never ending cycle with me and my family. Okay....maybe I'm feeling a little sorry for myself right now. But if you put it all out there then you might say that I have had my fair share of all of this. I guess I have been thinking about this for awhile and I'm just kind of upset about everything, so I'm sorry if I'm sounding mad. I been having some hard days these last few weeks and I just can't seem to get over this hump! I can't really count how many times that I broke down and cried yesterday. I cried when I took down the curtains that my Mom had put up, I just needed to wash them, but for some reason just taking them down was hard for me. I then went and looked through my pictures again.....big mistake! Not only did it make me upset, it made me mad at myself all over again for not having more pictures of her! I don't have many with her and Emmie and it just breaks my heart that some day she will ask why! Emmie got hurt yesterday and all I thought about was that I wanted to call my Mom! Why does that keep happening to me! She was always the first person I would call when something would happen to one of the kids. Now I don't have that person. In the end Emmie was fine, but she would have wanted to know about it and would have told me that everything was going to be fine.

Please don't give me any more.......I just can't handle it!