Big knot~

For the last few days me stomach has been in knots. I'm just at a loss on what to do. I went to bed on Friday night and very softly cried myself to sleep....well sort of. My mind was racing with all these thoughts. I have never been one to have confentrations with people and when I do...I just shut down and am unable to continue the conversation with out getting all emotional. That's just me. I wish I was different. My mind gets all crazy and I can't think. I end up not saying what I really want to say and then things are just left unsaid.

I want to tell my side of the story. But I feel like I have already lost the battle along time ago. My side just doesn't seem to matter to anyone. I feel like things have been getting worse as everyday goes by. I sit here and rethink and have everything worked out in my mind how I would say things....but will I actually say any of it?  Most likely not. I don't want to cause problems....but the more I sit on it...it just hurts me inside and I feel like I might just explode! And I'm sure that won't be good.